Yesterday, for the fourth time in less than a year, I experienced loss. First my mother, then my mother-in-law, then my best friend of over 20 years, then my lifetime best friend. I feel drained of strength. As a Christian, our personal strength is totally inadequate in dealing with such losses. Especially when not enough time for recuperation has transpired among those losses. So, while my personal strength dwindles, as it must, God’s strength can take over.  For when we acknowledge that only God’s strength is sufficient in times such as these, then will we be prepared to deal with loss. 

⁹ …, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:8-9 NIV

Then today, in the midst of yet another sorrow over the loss of my lifetime best friend, I get word that a young missionary friend, who is dear to me and my family, was senselessly killed.

What strength I had gained from God in my previous losses, was exploded away when we got word of our friend’s death.  For those losses made sense. Death due to cancer or old age is understandable. But not this loss. How do we understand what is not understandable? 

Our friend, leaves behind a wife and three young daughters, and a vibrant ministry there in the country where he served. What will they do now? What about his parents and siblings? So, what do I do with all my tumultuous thoughts. How can I pray effectively for my friend’s devastated wife and daughters, parents, siblings when I am in such turmoil myself? 

This verse came to my mind from Isaiah 55:8-9

⁸“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
    declares the Lord.
⁹ “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.

In my humanness, that part of me that is ruled by my flesh, the above verse just doesn’t cut it. But quietly the voice of God speaks to my spirit, that part of me that is ruled by God’s Holy Spirit, and whispers words to calm the thunder storm raging in my head.  

            Because God’s thoughts are higher than our thoughts, there are just going to be acts that God allows that we will not have the capacity to understand. Like in this case with the death of my young missionary friend.

To survive these ordeals, we must familiarize ourselves with what we do know about God. Camp down on verses that deal with God providing strength in times of weakness as in the verses of II Corinthians mentioned. Verses that encourage us to, 

“ trust God with all of our heart (especially when tragedy intrudes into our lives) and lean not on our own understanding. In all our ways acknowledge Him and He will direct our paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6). “

Receive the truth of verses like Joshua 1:9 as a warm blanket to ward off the cruel coldness of such tragedies.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

            I still don’t understand why this tragedy was allowed to happen. The pain and the horror are still so fresh. My mind revolts against the images of the trauma my young friend’s loved ones are having to endure. How do I pray for them?  I will focus on wording my prayers with what I do understand, what I do know:

I do know that when we need strength, God will provide it. (2 Corinthians 12:8-9)

I do know when we need peace God will provide it. (Philippians 4:6-7)

I do know that He will bring restoration. (Psalm 71:20 NKJV)

I do know that God hears our prayers and gives us what we need in answer to those prayers. (Psalm 34:18)

My prompting from God just now is to focus on what I do know about God and pray that over his family and friends. We must choose to trust God with the unanswerable questions !