Tag Archive | spirituality

The Quest for Happiness

Apr22
Our Happiness Checklist

Ask anyone these days about what they want for themselves. The most likely response is that they want to be ‘happy.’ I wonder what they mean by that exactly? A constant state of blissful happiness? Of course not. Because we all know that something has gone terribly wrong with the world we live in. Therefore, a constant state of blissful happiness isn’t realistic. (Has it ever been?)

Yet, even though it is an unrealistic focus, (and from whom can we assume that thought originated) we persist in doggedly pursuing such a quest. Therefore, in light of our lack of achievability of this goal, maybe we had better examine where the course we are on will lead.

If our dream is to be happy, how do we feel when unhappiness invades our dream? Or how do we feel when happiness just appears now and then but not overall? Or what do we do when we realize we are unhappy? Do we quit the course that is resulting in our misery and choose another course all together? Many people do that you know. (That’s the end result of such a fiery dart.)

If happiness is the paramount goal in life, then we will find ourselves going to any extreme to achieve it. Even if we have to make those close to us unhappy. Now does that make any sense? How can we be truly happy if our choices have created such unhappiness in those we are close to? (The fiery dart, of course, is: It was the only alternative. The only choice that would ensure our happiness)

Therefore, before we set upon THIS quest for happiness, let’s figure out just what genuine happiness is. Let’s examine what makes us happy and then ask ourselves this question: “After I have gained all that I wanted that could make me happy, what will happen to those achievements after I’m gone from this earth?” An important question to ponder, right!

The Bible states this caution relating to this type of quest for happiness.

What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Mark 8:36

So before we go searching in all the wrong places, let’s check a source that will put us on the right path: In Psalm 144 we read where King David prays to God for blessings which would make him and his people happy. He wraps up his prayer requests with verse 15. Here he acknowledges that yes these blessings would bring happiness. Nonetheless, authentic happiness (the true and lasting kind) would come from the One who bestowed these blessings.

I should remind us that this kind of happiness (also referred to as joy) will remain no matter if the blessings do not.

Watch Your Mouth!

Apr8

The more I learn about fiery darts, the more my awareness of their deadly work increases.  In this post, I would like to point out how things we say can set up another to have a major struggle with fiery darts.  At this point I haven’t quite figured out how to resolve this dilemma but here’s what I have noticed.

As an example, let’s say someone says something to you of a critical nature.  You receive their words and  the floodgate is opened to a variety of fiery darts.  The struggle is on, while you try to thwart each attack with Isaiah 54:17,

“No weapon that is formed against you will prevail.”

 You try to not overreact and try to respond reasonably, yet you cannot deny that your feelings have been hurt. Obviously, their criticism is unjust and now your struggle is weighted down by trying to figured out how you can respond without accepting blame you do not deserve but at the same time be open to see their side of it.  The onslaught of attacks are only intensified at this point, for  your resolve to stand strong against the fiery darts and their critical words begins to wear on you.

But you keep going back to the Truth of the particular situation and with a great deal of help from God, you find your footing.

THEN

you find out they were only teasing and even though they know you didn’t ‘get it’, they remain insensitive to the pain inflicted by their negative teasing. So now, you’ve got a new phase of fiery darts to deal with, ugh!  It’s not as easy to laugh at yourself as it is for the person who criticized you in jest, but you try. What do you do with that real pain you struggled with?  Does it never end?

Well, you move on, determined to not allow this to negatively affect the relationship but wondering if you should have a frank conversation with this person about the carelessness and insensitivity of their little joke.  But wait, if you do, will they take you seriously or will they just say you’re making a mountain out of a molehill?  The last thing you want is to make an honest appeal to them concerning your feelings only to have them be lightly or casually dismissed.

In this example, can you see how we set each other up to be attacked by fiery darts?  I think situations like this can be remedied by making sure that our intentions or meanings to what we say are clearly received by others.  And if we aren’t sure about the intention of something said to us, then we should ask a simple question like, “Are you saying …….?”  Then too, keeping the following verse in mind, could help a lot–especially when we are in teasing mode:

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”  Ephesians 4:29

Just a thought.  What do you think?