As some of you may know, I write another blog about being a parent of a foreign missionary, giving a transparent view of what that’s like. This post gives some insight as to what I’ve learned about fiery darts as it applies to being the mom of a missionary.
Every time I see a picture of my 20 month old grandson or hear his voice when his daddy calls me, I get blasted with a huge onslaught of fiery darts such as:
-my grandson doesn’t know me
-the memories I am making with my grandchildren here always exclude him
-he has no memory of our time together (when he was 3 & 4 months)
-I miss out on the milestones of his development; first steps, crawling, first words, first tooth
-I can’t hug him, or hold him, or play with him, or rock him to sleep
How on earth do I find a way to get through my days burdened with these thoughts?
The main thing I do is to RESIST these thoughts. Yes, they are true but what good does it do to dwell on them? I don’t particularly enjoy being miserable but if I allow these fiery dart thoughts to rule my thinking then miserable I would be.
What do I do instead?
I recognize them for the fiery darts they are.
I reject them. (I don’t allow myself to dwell on such thoughts)
I replace these thoughts with truth thoughts.
-Thanking God for the time I got to visit him where I held him, sang to him, and lavished as much attention on him as I could.
-Looking forward to future visits with him for he will be 2+ and might even be able to remember me some.
-Resting in the peace that God will give us a special attachment for each other.
-Being content to share in his life though packages from home, and whatever media source God provides.
-Thanking God for the relationship I have with his parents knowing they will be deliberate about making sure my grandson will know me.
But the main thing is to accept and be at peace with the call of God on his parent’s life, and giving them all the love and support they deserve. Philippines 4:6-7 is my stabilizing force in all of this:
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.-