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Embracing Contentment: Life Lessons in Winter – Part 2

Jun6

Initially as we approach our declining years, we find ourselves at a crossroads. It all sounds a bit overwhelming, doesn’t it, and if we aren’t careful, it will be. Personally, in comparison, the season of winter has been the most trying and challenging.

Until this season there was always the activities of caring and enjoying my family and friends, serving in my church, and teaching school. Without these fulfilling and purposeful activities, I struggled to find my purpose. I was tempted to see the road ahead as dull and unfulfilling! Yet I knew that sort of vision, if it persisted, would lead to major fiery dart attacks. I also knew that God had better plans for me.

However, the word that surfaces most often in my head these days is ‘contentment.’  I’m discovering contentment, while desirable, isn’t all that easy to come by. Nonetheless, that’s what I desire in this season. Therefore, I have persisted in my pursuit to be content. I’m finding, however, it isn’t automatic! It’s not something I can have just because it’s a better option. You know how I discovered that? Well, I direct you to:

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 

Did you catch that word ‘learned?’ Well, I didn’t ‘catch’ it until I found myself in short supply of contentment. It just wasn’t happening for me to make up my mind to be content. Ugh! This was challenging. As I returned to that verse again and again, the light finally clicked on. Contentment is a learning process. I had to learn to be content. Day by day, step by step!

I’m learning in this season that every moment is holy because God is present, no matter the circumstances,  He is present with me in all my situations, even if the situations are difficult to bear. God reminds me there is no need for me to fear for He is with me; I do not have to be dismayed, for He is God, He will strengthen me and help me. His presence assures me of this, as well as His word.

While bouts of loneliness, uncertainty, and/or sadness threaten my contentment at times, I’m learning that focusing on truths like Isaiah 41:10, is a game changer. Fiery darts such as these can be conquered when contentment rules. And that is a wondrous thing to learn in the winter season of my life. Yours too, I pray!

The Winter Season of Life – Part 1

May27

One of the common characteristics of the winter season of life is facing loss. Loss of physical strength or the onset of illness takes center stage. No matter how much we fight it, our strength will wane. Additionally, the loss of those we know and love increases with the announcement of ever increasing obituaries.

Yet, here we are. The winter of life is upon us. With every loss, no matter its characteristic, we are brought closer to the reality that life here on earth is but temporary. Something the previous seasons of life kept us too occupied to consider. Until now our desire to accumulate more for ourselves was an ongoing motivation. That isn’t the case now. Decluttering and lessening the demands of our accumulations is something we give consideration to in our later years. 

For many of us, our children have ventured onto paths that have lead them to places that have placed them inconveniently out of reach. Where once our days were satisfied with caring for their needs and enjoying their presence, their absence leaves a lonely void. Whether they live nearby or far away. The harsh cold truth is, they don’t need us anymore in the same way they use to.

Formerly, the manner in which we lived our lives contributed to our fulfillment of purpose. But with retirement and an empty house, that sense of purpose or usefulness has dramatically been altered. Add that to the limitations age presents us with, either by physical decline or illness, there just isn’t a lot to look forward to.

Another lesson, much more challenging, is learning to prevent past failures and mistakes from intruding into our present. Intrusions which dictate troubling attitudes and actions. When we allow ourselves to be reminded of the regrets of our past, they will build in force. And unless we learn to counter their attacks, we will find ourselves fighting a loosing battle.

Learning how to repel the negative thoughts (you remember, Fiery Darts) in order to replace them with positive thoughts (or Truth thoughts) is a constant battle, I’m afraid. But then I’m reminded of this question from my book,  “Do I want to spend the rest of my life successfully warding off fiery darts, or do I want to remain a victim of them?” (p 65, FD 3rd Edition)

In Part Two, I will delve further into life’s winter season and offer insights as to how to clear away the clouds of uncertainty that can accompany these dark days.

The Voice to Listen to…

Jul23

My most difficult battles are fought within the arena of self! As a Christian, I understand that I am made up of my body, soul, and spirit. My body while alive on this earth is in a constant civil war between my soul (ruled by my flesh) and my spirit (ruled by God’s Holy Spirit at the point when I believed in and accepted Christ). But I must choose who rules. And therein lies the struggle.

For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.Galatians 5:17

*For too many years, I experienced more defeat than victory. (Fiery Darts 3rd Edition, p. 14) And it wasn’t until God made me aware of the weapons (fiery darts) of Ephesians 6:16 that I began to understand why.

As a young adult (that’s been a long time ago now!), I succumbed to the enemy’s main line of attack: keeping me distracted from daily spending time with God in prayer and in His Word. I naively thought that by attending church faithfully, reading my Bible now and then, praying often, taking to heart the Truths I heard in sermons, and just basically trying to be a good Christians that would suffice in overcoming the attacks from the enemy. I would have victories, yes, but some of my greatest failures occurred during those years. Why?

By not setting aside daily time with God in prayer and the reading of my Bible, God’s Spirit within me was simply not getting fed enough . I fell prey to human reasoning and false assumptions fed to me by my flesh. The weapons I needed to fight my battles successfully were within the pages of Scripture. By not availing myself to God’s instruction on what the weapons were and how to use them, my vulnerability to the manipulation and deception of the enemy increased.

Now that I’m older and thankfully wiser (due to the instruction from God’s word about the weapons available to me), I am more alert to the enemy’s attacks. Thus my victories have increased. For example, as a 76 year old, I have questions about my future. How much more time I might have left with my children and grandchildren? Will I still have decent health or not? Will I still be able to stay in my home? If I’m not careful those questions (note they are all self-centered) will pop up in my mind and my flesh will attempt to grab them. Fear, despair, doubt, worry, all stand by, on the ready to receive the baton and run.

But God has taught me a cleaver trick. He asks me a question of His own when those questions arise. “Whose voice is speaking to you?” Because I have learned from time spent with God in prayer and His word, I have been made aware of the following:

God gives us the ability to think. We are capable of our own independent thoughts and we will frequently have thoughts such as “I’m hungry” or “I’m tired.” But it’s also important to keep in mind that the enemy will also speak to us in the form of thoughts in the first-person singular, such as “I can’t do this.” We must take those thoughts and determine if they are consistent with God’s word.

Thus I knew that thoughts of my future that invoked fear, despair, doubt, or worry were not consistent with God’s word. For example, God tells me in 2 Timothy 1:7, that He has not given me the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a strong mind. In Philippians 4:6-7, I’m reminded, Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. These are just two examples (they are in abundance in the Scriptures) of how to distinguish between God’s voice and the enemy’s voice.

So when these negative questions arise originating in my flesh and influenced by the enemy, I counter them with this prayer based on Isaiah 54:17, May this weapon formed against me not prevail… It stops there. The battle is won.

But allow me to add those fiery darts will return again and again. It’s not a one time battle. As long as we live we will wage war with the enemy. He won’t give up, until we are secure in heaven. It’s just the truth of the matter. But thankfully God sent Christ to secure our heavenly home and equip us with the weapons we need to fight successfully against our enemy, Satan, while we live here on earth.

*Remember, my book Fiery Darts: Satan’s Weapon of Choice can be purchased as an e-book. If you are interested, please check the sideboard.

The Resurrection and then what?

Mar27

 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, Ephesians 1:18-20

As Christians, we have available to us the ability to access the very same power that raised Christ from the dead according to the above verse. The power to live in this world at this time, with all of the discrediting of God and His word, would necessarily need to be powerful to counter the abundance of lies thrown at us daily.

Our enemy, Satan, is the main force behind the libelous suggestions bombarding us daily that undermine our faith and threaten our spiritual growth. He has whispered lies into our ears that we shouldn’t take God, Christ, the Holy Spirit too seriously. His message is, we will be denied the pleasures in life that make us happy. He has convinced us that all we really need to do is to be a good person, and/or attend church ever so often. It isn’t really necessary to do much praying or reading of our Bibles.

For you see, the main thrust of Satan’s plan is to keep us ignorant of the truths of Scripture. For not only will a little exposure to God’s word, expose the enemy’s tactics, but it will also illuminate all the riches available to us as Christians.

Consider the above verse’s mentioning of the riches of resurrection power! That same power God exercised when restoring life to Jesus, is also ours to access. It’s the power we need to bring the thoughts Satan tries to plant in our mind under God’s control. It’s the power we need to keep the heavy handiness of the enemy from destroying us. It’s the power we need to recognize the temptations the enemy would bring to bear upon us and to resist those temptations. It’s the power we need to choose the right path. It’s the power we need that will expose the enemy’s lies.

So after accepting Christ as our Savior, taking to heart his sacrifice on our behalf, the next step is to learn about this Resurrection power. It will be a growing thing. Like practicing how to use a weapon. The more we learn about how to use it and practice using it, the more skilled we become. We become less vulnerable to the enemy’s tricks.

This is what comes after accepting personally Jesus’s death and resurrection.

Ignorance is not bliss!

Aug31

As I write this blog post, I am in Edinburgh having accompanied my son and his family when they moved here so my son could work on a doctorate at the university. My plan is to hang around to help in any way that I can, then after my stay is completed I will make my solo journey home. (Not looking forward to that!!)

Being a genuine help, especially to my children, is a strong motivator for me. Yet, I struggle with fear that at 75 years of age, I will become limited as to how much help I will continue to be. Every increased ache or pain is taken advantage of by my flesh (that part of me that isn’t willing to be obedient to God’s Spirit in me), tempting me with doubts that I won’t be able to make but this one trip. My son will likely live here four or five years with his wife and two sons. Therefore my desire is to visit them once each year. But my flesh is stubbornly consistent in casting doubts and reeling in the thought that my desires won’t be fulfilled.

I battle constantly it seems with thoughts that my health will play out and prevent me from being the source of help and support I desire to be. When normal movement produces a sudden pain and/or discomfort , my thoughts become cloaked with negativity. Thoughts like, “You won’t last. What if you have to go to a doctor? You will become an inconvenience, not a source of help. That will mess up everything for them and for you.”

This is where my time of testing comes into full play. God has pointed out sources from His word where I can go to steady my thoughts and gain the perspective I need to assist me in recognizing the source of these doubts. The determination to reject them. And the insight to apply the powerful wisdom of these verses to defeat them. For instance: 

Psalm 34:4, ” I sought the LORD, and He answered me, and delivered me from all my fears.” (especially concerning the future of my health) 

God reminded me that my fears are nothing but fiery darts. My fears did not originate with Him. It was not His voice I was hearing. How did I know this? Because Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the LORD with all of your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.” 

Besides, Jeremiah 29:11 promises me this, “For I know the plans I have for you says the LORD. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. To give you a future and a hope.”

I can defeat the enemy by wielding the weapons God has assigned to me, or the enemy can defeat me by keeping me ignorant of such weapons.

Set backs will happen…

Jul8

I’m learning that reaching the final stage, Acceptance, in the grieving process doesn’t mean the road is now clear ahead. The other day, I made a run into town to Hobby Lobby, one of my favorite stores. I suspected this might be challenging. For you see, not only is it my favorite store, it was also Joney’s favorite.

Consequently, as soon as I walked through the door my mind was inundated with memories of the many shopping excursions Joney and I had made there. We never left that store empty handed. As a matter of fact, we often carried out more than we intended to buy! Sound familiar? But as God always does, He went before me and provided a shopping companion for me. My teenage granddaughter accompanied me thus lessening the impact going it alone would have had.

But eventually the time came to return my treasure of a granddaughter to her destination. Then I began the drive home. Once again, I was bombarded with memories. Memories of conversations that ran the gamut from deep spiritual thoughts to hilarious nonsensical thoughts. I could always count on Joney to spark a healthy dose of laughter to make the hard realities of truth easier to swallow. (Sounds like a line from Mary Poppins, doesn’t it)

Yet this time, I heard no ones voice but mine. And the quiet was, as they say, deafening . Loneliness enveloped me. I exerted much effort to block the negative, you know, fiery darts, with God’s Truth thoughts. Truths such as:

 fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 ESV

 “My Presence will go with you (He was saying I was not alone), and I will give you rest.” Exodus 33:14, NIV

However, as strong as these Truths were, the cloud of sadness continued to envelope me. Sadness brought on by the loneliness I was feeling intensified as fear and doubt joined its rank. These fiery darts took advantage of my low spirits by pressing me with thoughts of additional complications I might be facing as I grew older and less likely to manage without help.

Nevertheless, I continued pressing in to God. Psalms 34 became my anchor. God kept saying, I will be with you, I will deliver you from all of your fears, I will save you, to take refuge in Him, and on and on. Words to focus on, to believe in and apply!

It took a few days for God’s words to steady me. But as the cloud slowly dissipated, I’ve come to realize that set backs are a useful part of the healing process. They have a God designed purpose. For when the fiery darts are fired, putting up our shield of faith is necessary, if we want to thwart the attack. By cooperating with God, He will utilize the effects of the set back for our good. The following verse reveals the outcome:

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10 NIV

The IF game…

Feb10

Going through a trying time? Not sure where things will lead? Anticipating a variety of outcomes, none of which sets well?

All of us, sooner or later, will find ourselves facing trying times. And the added downer is that trying times are repetitive. (They come and go, then come and go again) During such times decisions must be made and we don’t always have the clarity we feel we need. We find ourselves worrying about what is next. Thoughts of possible troubling outcomes rise up in our thoughts. So we resort to wording our prayers to persuade God to suit our desires for the outcome.

When trying times hit us our human nature insists on knowing how this all will play out. Thus the game board is set in place to play the ‘IF’ game. And as is predictable with human nature, our thoughts move to the negative. As a result, the processing of these negative outcomes puts us in a quandary.

Over the last several years of trying times and even more recently, I have become very familiar with the temptation to try and second guess God? (As if that was even possible!) Here’s how the temptation typically plays out.

A problem takes center stage. We enact auto pilot and react. Then as things progress, we scramble to figure out where to land. And the ‘IF’ game begins. Every card we play presents a negative scenario. It’s a loose/loose situation; it seems!

As a result, I’ve come to recognize the “If” game is a tool of the enemy to create hopelessness and despondency. The enemy is relentless and it’s a strenuous struggle to not give over any ground to him. My only reliable defense is to call upon God. Depending upon the severity of the struggle, it may need to be a day by day exercise. (hour by hour in some cases) I sense that God’s will not my will should be the intent of my prayers. Therefore the following has become my plan of action:

Reject this game and replace it with God’s truth.

God is going to do what God is going to do. Therefore, I must submit to whatever His will is in this matter. Even though I may not know exactly what that is, I do know that I can trust God to work it out for the good.

Therefore I am faced with a choice.

I can play the “If” game and reap the consequences

OR

I can choose to adapt God’s way of thinking and reap the rewards:

“Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” HCSB Philippines 4:6-7

I choose the reward of peace!

Replacing lies with Truth thoughts…

May24

We have Recognized. We have Rejected. Now it’s time to replace!

Replacing fiery dart thoughts with Truth thoughts

Something that often gets overlooked, is the necessity of replacing the lies of a fiery dart. For the empty space left when the lie was rejected, needs to be filled. Otherwise when the lie returns, and it will return, the lie gains reentry. This is when Truth thoughts come into play. For thoughts about what is true are required to fill the void left by the rejected lie. And to know what Truth thoughts to call upon, we must be familiar with the source of where they are contained. That, of course, is God’s word, the Bible. Therefore, we must be prepared and stand ready to wield this Sword of Truth, if these lies are to be extinguished.

Doubt and confusion, resided in the background of my thoughts. Every ready to spring into action when given the opportunity. Even though I had been a Christian for many years, I had allowed too much of the world’s concepts of truth to influence my attitudes, perspectives, and actions. It was easier to listen to the world rather than take time to delve into the Bible for answers. Needless to say, doubt and confusion were given many opportunities to inject their poison. Plain and simple – I didn’t know enough of what the Bible had to say, in regard to my doubts and confusion. As a result, my skill in the use of my Sword of Truth was sorely lacking.

My only hope to gain strength and successfully fight off the lies of the enemy, was to daily expose my thoughts to the Truths of Scripture. It is the main food for any soldier in God’s army. In my weakened state, God nourished me with a simple but powerful Truth to rebuff the enemy. By applying the Truth of Isaiah 54:17a, “No weapon that is formed against you will succeed;” to refer to the weapon of fiery darts, the lies were thwarted.

This verse has become the first swipe of my Sword of Truth in my attack. This affords me the opportunity to search for a specific word from God to extinguish a specific lie. Thereafter, I could wield my sword with tailor made precision to attack and extinguish the lie.

The benefit of searching for specific scriptures to add to our weapon cache, is obvious. The more our weapon supply is increased, the greater our victories over the enemy. That translates into our becoming more knowledgeable of the Truths of God’s Word. Knowledge that empowers us to be equipped with the weapons needed to counter Satan’s attacks.

This taste of victory over the manipulation and deception of the lies is sweet. It is the one thing that guarantees our release from the bondage we have been tricked into believing is freedom. This Truth sets us free from the lies that have created our bondage.

The Real Me…

Apr27

Ever had a thought intrude upon your mind that made you shutter? Have you had thoughts about a situation that just couldn’t move beyond the negative? Do these types of thoughts plant seeds of concern about who you really are? If we persist in giving sway to these concerns, they will set us on a path of lies and deception.

But as Christians, we have a defense against such deception. It is clearly stated in over 100 verses in God’s authoritative word that our true identity is based on our personal relationship with God. By believing in Christ and accepting His sacrifice on our behalf, our bodies became the dwelling place of Christ via the Holy Spirit. At the moment of salvation, our old self’s took on a new identity. Therefore, my true identity, my authentic self, is based on my new life in Christ. I am no longer deceived. I have the assurance my negative feelings are not my true self. In other words, “I was one way then I was completely different and what happened in between was Him.” (Season 1, Ep. 1, The Chosen)

Ponder these Truths:

…and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. Ephesians 4:22-24 ESV

Yet, when we reject God’s authoritative word, we open our sin nature (our old identity) to any and everything false. And today the downward spiral of the morals of our country gives evidence of the consequences of such rejection. Some have even digressed to the point that they place authority and value on feelings, over God’s transcendent truths, to define their authentic selves.

In short, the modern self is one where authenticity is achieved by acting outwardly in accordance with one’s inward feelings.

Strange New World: How Thinkers and Activists redefined identity and sparked the Sexual Revolution by Carl T. Trueman

When the feelings of ‘self’ dictate our attitude and actions, we are capable of choices that fly in the face of God. Choices that will eventually set us and those directly affected by our choices on a path of destruction. Attitudes and actions that deep within our hearts we know are wrong.

Feelings as authority vs God as authority?

The Scriptures explain the nature of our old selves and why the world rejects those of us who belong to God, as well as God’s authoritative word.

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him. 1 John 3:1 ESV

To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires,..Ephesians 4:22

Consider

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.

I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10 ESV

What to do?

Aug9

Version 2

What do we do when in spite of all that we know and believe, the darkness continues to stalk us? We wait and wait but the hoped for relief remains a no show.

Instead of giving in and sinking lower and lower, try putting one foot in front of the other. Whatever we do we do not give into the hopelessness.

Instead we hold up our shield of faith and extinguish all the fiery darts of the enemy. (based on Ephesians 6:16.) One fiery dart at a time.

We replace every fiery dart thought with a Truth thought from God.

We keep moving forward, depending on God’s strength.

 

And if in spite of all of this, the darkness remains?

Remember, God’s way is the only way. There is no other way that will bring the help we need. Focus on trusting God to come through for us.

This will require faith. Maybe more than we have at the moment. Trust God to supply what we lack.

Ask for help to shut out the negative debilitating thoughts; to replace them with God’s thoughts. .

Maybe it’s been lingering far longer than we could imagine.

That doesn’t make God’s Word any less true.

Yet the stalking negativity sometimes keeps hanging around.

Then just keep putting one foot of faith in front of the other. Looking neither to the right or the left. 

Keep in mind, everyday won’t be like this. There will be better days here and there. We won’t drown in just one day. 

Hebrews 10:36, You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.