Tag Archive | moving forward

Alone but not alone…

Sep8
Ecclesiastes 3:4 – “There is a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.”

We stood by your grave today in the context of a calm and comforting autumn day

It was the first time since your passing that the two of us stood there, together

We stood there gazing in unbelief (still) that your name was on that grave marker

We talked about the loneliness that hung over us since we have been separated

And intensified since you moved to heaven

We were forced to move forward, without you, and without the comfort of each other’s presence

We were each on our own, and loneliness has been our constant (but hidden) companion

But in time we were reunited for a short while

Enough time to recall the past memories we all 3 had shared

Memories that were fresh and made fresher in their recollection

I heard myself laughing like I always did when the 3 of us were together

But hadn’t since you passed away and our paths took different directions

Now our brief reunion has ended

But we have tasted the sweetness of our laughter once again and felt its healing comfort

Now we will move forward returning to our individual paths

While the echoes of our laughter lingers in our thoughts

and though on our singular paths, alone but not alone!


Blessed are you who weep now,
    for you will laugh. Luke 6:21 b

Moving through grief, but keeping to the course…

Jun17

It’s been a few weeks now and while I’m still mourning the loss of my best friend, I do believe I have reached a turning point. The counsel of God, instructed me, early on, to take my time in grieving. And how long that time needed to be was up to me. So, I’m taking my time. Moving through as the light is given.

I spent time praying and seeking God’s counsel in His word. I’ve also leaned into writings of Christian writers that pointed me back to Christ. Such as C S Lewis and the website I referred to in an earlier post. I was prompted to cry out to God, like so many writers of Psalms did. For there was much I could not understand. I had questions, that had no answers. But I verbalized them to God, nevertheless. He was the only one who would allow me to unload without it threatening our relationship.

And that time spent in prayer and God’s word has and is bringing healing. The danger of dwelling on the unanswerable questions is that I wouldn’t move through the stages of grief in a healthy manner . I would get bogged down. For instance, “Grieving brings a deep sense of isolation. Isolation is a liar and tries to convince people they are alone and not understood.” Sounds like fiery darts doesn’t it!

But eventually, baby step by baby step, God is leading me out of my sorrowful darkness. While the pain may still be a dull ache that won’t go away, it is not as overwhelming as before. And while I may still have unanswered questions, I’m learning to not allow them to steal my focus. My moving forward will be impaired if I dwell on issues that are not in my realm to answer.

As I move into the Acceptance stage, I’m learning my reality has changed. “Acceptance has to do with concluding and moving on. We come to grips with the reality that there is no “going back to normal” rather, there is only a “new normal.”  My new normal is proving to be a learn-as-I go effort. I need God’s insight to navigate it successfully. Taking to heart God’s words from Scripture and applying them to my walk daily, gives me the light that will keep me on the path God has laid out for me.

Moving forward though trials persist

Apr13

   

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Trials and Temptations

     2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

    Once we grasp the truth that God has a plan for our lives, (and that hopefully happens early on) we begin to move forward in that plan. As we exercise our faith muscles, our faith increases in strength. The more mature our faith grows, the wiser we become.  The expectation is that we would move forward consistently as our faith develops. 

     Our new nature, given to us at our spiritual birth, desires to please God. Yet, we will always struggle with our old nature always wanting its way.  Trials come and trials go, but with every one our character is improved upon. 

     But what about those trials that refuse to ‘go away’? They perhaps contain the strongest of life lessons.  You know, those every day trials that prevent us from living life victoriously. 

     Trials of this nature usually involve learning how to get along with others.  Nothing we say or do brings improvement in them or the relationship. Instead of growing wiser and resolving the situation, despair sets in. Satan manipulates and deceives our flesh, our old nature. Lying to us about what is wrong and setting our focus on ourselves. 

     We are primed to become distracted by human reasoning and false assumptions. Without realizing it, we have become influenced by Satan to do his will.   We get mired down in these kinds of trials with every lie cast upon us by the enemy. We take on the attitude that nothing is going to change and spiritual growth and/or pleasing God fades into the mist. Blindness rules on both sides of the equation.

     Perhaps accepting things the way they are in these situations may be the best way to move forward through them. By moving on we leave it up to God to make changes in His timing and will. Forgiving and accepting permits us to throw off the shackles of judgement and condemnation. The liberty to breathe free is ours to claim by the power of God’s word. This sort of example, is a lifeline for those  searching for comfort in their own stubborn trials .

     So, when trials persist without bringing the desired solution, there is still a way to move forward. Moving forward is possible but it takes a mindset that requires a high level of trust in God. A trust that even though the desired solution has not been realized, our confidence that God is in control and is working out His plan remains steadfast.

 Remember: God’s ways are not our ways, His thoughts are higher than ours.

He ALWAYS knows what is best.