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Reclaiming Your Self-Worth–God’s Way!

Oct14

My Dramatic Transformation

As God exposed the weapons of fiery darts that for years Satan had skillfully used against me, my spiritual walk underwent a dramatic transformation. By teaching me what fiery darts were and how to counter their attack, my walk along the path God had set before me so many years before was illuminated to such an extent that my skill in recognizing Satan’s tactics dramatically improved along with my ability to successfully fight against the fiery darts. FD p. 6

A Pivotal Question!

For am I now trying to win the favor of people, or God? Or am I striving to please people?. . . Galatians 1:10 (HCSB)

     No Christian ever wants to admit that they are more concerned about pleasing people than they are pleasing God. But that is exactly what I, the people pleaser, was doing! God revealed this to me several years ago in the midst of a tumultuous episode when a particular decision I had made resulted in creating discord among many.

     For the first time in my adult life, people were severely displeased with me and I couldn’t handle that! At first! But after much counsel and doing some honest soul searching about the Galations verse, my course was redirected. My downward spiral was interrupted as God reached down and rescued me from the plans that Satan had concocted.

    Pleasing God now trumped pleasing people! It was quite liberating to live life that way! And on top of that I had the reassurance that,

When a man’s ways please the LORD, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. Proverbs 16:7 (HCSB)

    Another powerful lesson learned during those days was how something that Satan meant for bad was turned into something good by God. Therefore, I saw all those involved as instruments of God’s will in helping me understand how important it was to please Him above all others. As a result there was no anger or bitterness on my part towards anyone.

     As I look back on events such as the one I just described through the lens of fighting fiery darts, I gain clarity about the work of Satan’s manipulation. Of how he can take my weaknesses and victimize me with my own thoughts. Now when those fiery darts try to infiltrate my thinking, by God’s design, I have a plan in place to reject them thus averting the devastation those weapons formerly imposed. 

No more downward spirals; depression has been defeated!

Who’s Messing With Your Self Worth?

Oct7
The Cognitive Triangle

The Cognitive Triangle

First we entertain a thought. That thought will cause certain related feelings. Thus, behavior is based on our thoughts and feelings.  p.16, FD

     Several years ago and over a two year period of time, I suffered from a serious bout of depression. I remember battling suicidal thoughts and deep sadness to the point that my prayers became a desperate cry for God to hold on to me because I had no strength left to hold on to Him.  I survived that dark time in my life but that’s about it. It wouldn’t be until several years later as God initiated my training in fiery dart recognition that I would be able to recognize the bondage that defined my existence during those two years. 

Here’s what happened to me and I see this same overused but deadly effective tactic of Satan’s still being used today!

     Refer to the diagram above. In my case I was a people pleaser. If I felt significant people in my life approved of me, then life was good and I felt good about myself. On the other hand, if there was strife or conflict in these relationships life was not good and I became convinced I had little reason to feel good about myself. Self approval you see was strongly connected to what others thought of me. (Or what I thought they thought!)

Do you see the pattern?

     First this negative thought (fiery dart remember) would plant itself into my head producing some very negative feelings or emotions. Never mind that these negative thoughts had no basis in Truth! The poison of these fiery darts seeped into my thinking producing destructive attitudes and behavior. 

     The purpose of these fiery darts, you see, was to diminish any sense of self worth that I might still possess. I was an easy target because it was way too important for me to have the good opinion of those significant people in my life. As relationships with these people deteriorated, so did my self worth.

I wonder if I have touched a nerve? 

     Are you sad seemingly all the time? Are you convinced you don’t measure up and that significant persons in your life don’t approve of you? Does the dangerous thought that your family would be better off without you ever sneak into your mind? Please hold on, for I have glorious news for you in my next post. In the meantime hold on to the following verse,

For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the LORD. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. To give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Refusing Admittance!

Sep29

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     In observing the effect fiery dart thinking has on people, I am drawing some disturbing conclusions. I have listened and observed as people (whose lives exhibit some semblance of Christianity) describe a lifestyle that is in direct contradiction to the one given to us by God. They attend church ( perhaps not regularly) and know all the familiar Christian lingo. But they live as if there is no contradiction in their lifestyle.

How can this be?

     Could it be that they have lost their sensitivity to sin? They seemingly are not bothered with conviction about their lifestyle. Even though their lives are marked with pain and unfulfilled dreams, the realization that their disobedience could be the source of their disillusionment never kicks in.
     I know that when we are first convicted about sin in our lives, the temptation is to ignore it, deny it, or to begin justifying it. And though this is where the Enemy is most easily conquered, this is where for many Satan gains full entry.
“Above all, we must be especially alert against the beginnings of temptation, for the enemy is more easily conquered if he is refused admittance to the mind and is met beyond the threshold when he knocks. . . .Thus, because he is not resisted in the beginning, Satan gains full entry. And the longer a man delays in resisting, so much the weaker does he become each day, while the strength of the enemy grows against him.” p. 46 FD (Thomas Kempis)
     This, I conclude, is how an individual can live contrary to God and in alliance with the world without apparent guilt! The fiery darts that justifies their sin, if not resisted, will eventually release so much poison into their thinking that they become blinded to God’s Truth. Therefore, they may be convinced they are something they are not! You know, right becomes wrong!

But there’s good news!

These poisonous thoughts (fiery darts) CAN BE conquered dear reader! Not overnight, but by attacking one thought at a time, as directed by the prayer and Bible study I refer to in Fiery Darts: Satan’s Weapon of Choice! It will take some longer than others depending on the amount of poison that has infected their thinking, but there is a future for them that is free of this bondage! It’s God’s plan:
“‘For I know the plans I have for you’, declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future,’” (NIV) Jeremiah 29:11

God, Our Logistics Coordinator wrap up!

Jun23
This my friend, is how you conquer the fiery dart of worry!

This my friend, is how you conquer the fiery dart of worry!

I am just a worrier. It’s the way I was made.  I can’t help it!

     The next time you make that statement or hear someone else make that statement, I hope you will refer to my blog posts. You see, worry is a major fiery dart! Worry will create all sorts of turmoil within your mind. That turmoil will make you vulnerable and a prime target for fiery darts that will undermine your trust and faith in God.  

     If you ever have any thoughts like the ones I opened with in this post, then plant your feet firmly in God’s Word and

1 – Recognize those thoughts for the fiery darts that they are

2 – Reject them outright for dear readers they are nothing but lies

3 – Replace them with Truth thoughts (go to your computer and type in the phrase “verses about worry” for there you will find a bunch of them. God has a lot to say about worrying) but I highly recommend,

 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:67 (NIV)

     Now that you have had the opportunity to read my last two posts illustrating, through personal testimony, why I see God as my logistics coordinator, I hope I have given you food for thought that will deflect all those fiery darts that tempt you to worry. He will prove to you, as He does for me over and over again, that He can be trusted to work all things out for my good (ooh, sounds like Romans 8:28 doesn’t it!)  That, my dear readers is a liberated way to live!

God – Our Logistics Coordinator! or How to Fight Worry! Part One

May27

 

This is me; not trusting!

This is me; in worry mode!

 

     Awhile back, two of my friends and I took a road trip to attend a ladies’ retreat in the mountains; about an 8 hour drive from our homes. (Of course, that’s just the drive time; we stopped at Cracker Barrel going and coming. The two in one experience–eating and shopping, you know. Well then, let’s say 8+ hours.)  We learned a lot about each other, made a heap of memories, and discovered a rather unique character trait possessed by God.  It has taken numerous experiences for God to teach me that He can work things out without me fretting and worrying over how He’s going to do it.  So while I have been blessed by this trait of God’s, it wasn’t until this trip that I found a name for it.  And here it is:

Logistics Coordinator!

     A logistics coordinator, by definition, is someone who plans, implements, and coordinates the details for someone else.  After reading the illustration below, followed by the 2nd illustration in my next blog post, I hope it will become clear to you that acknowledging God’s ability to work things out for our good (Romans 8:28), is a powerful weapon in defeating worry.  So, let’s begin!

Illustration No. 1

     My friends and I were driving to a quaint little restaurant in the mountains for lunch. We had driven to this little lakeside restaurant the day before but had arrived too late to eat.  This time we left early enough to arrive in time for lunch and to enjoy a spectacular view in the process.  But while time was on our side as we made our way towards the restaurant on that picture perfect spring day, my gas gauge was not!  I notified my friends that we were getting rather low on gas and it might be a good idea to pray.  None of us could remember exactly how much further the restaurant was or even IF we had enough gas to get us there.  So, we prayed for a gas station!

    Now, here’s where the connection to Worry comes into play.  Under the circumstances, I am sure you can understand why we were sorely tempted to fret and worry.  You name the fiery darts that would be apparent on such an occasion and believe me Satan shot them at us.  And as I watched that gas gauge move closer and closer to the empty mark, and no gas station or restaurant yet appeared on the near horizon, I felt it was necessary that I come up with a plan just in case God’s plan was NOT to get us to a gas station in time.  I knew that my friends at the camp would come to our rescue, if needed.  But then we were in the mountains and cell reception was ‘iffy’ at best.  (Okay, sometimes you can over think a situation!)

     I resisted the fiery darts with all the strength I could muster from my lessons on how to fight (and win) against  such negative thinking.  I called on the 3 R’s of fighting fiery darts: 1)recognize the fiery darts  2) resist the fiery darts  3) replace the fiery darts (you remember, with truth thoughts.

https://fierydarts.wordpress.com/2014/02/17/the-3-rs-of-fighting-fiery-darts-revised-plan

     It was an effort on my part but by the grace of God, I maintained a controlled calm.  My friends were doing the same, but I knew it was a struggle.  The reason I knew that was because of all the wise cracks they were making.  When you are faced with a dilemma such as ours, sometimes laughter is a beneficial distraction.

     And as so often happens, a few minutes after the ‘need to fill the gas tank asap’ light came on (causing the oxygen level to be seriously depleted as we all gasped for air) there appeared the gas pumps (not station, just a couple of dated pumps outside a run down little  mom and pop type grocery).  And next door to them was the restaurant; still open!  We were rescued!

     Wow, I came away from that adventure convinced I had the best logistics coordinator in the universe (and of course, I did. We all do, actually). There is one more experience that I want to share with you that will illustrate the benefit of seeing God as our very own and personal Logistics Coordinator!  However, this is enough for now, so I will wait till next post and bring all this to a conclusion then.  

Why I can resist the temptation to despair?

Oct14

So much of what is going on in my beloved country today, quite frankly, disturbs me. And were it not for what I read in the Bible, I would despair.  Did you notice that I said, “Were it not for what I read in the Bible. . .”  There’s a verse in Lamentations which gives me the basis for why I can resist the temptation to despair.

Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning, great is your faithfulness. Lam. 3:22-23

What I would like to share with my readers today applies to those who acknowledge the Bible as the source of Truth and have accepted Christ as their Savior.  

As I read God’s Word, The Bible, (and I make a daily practice of it. Not because I feel obligated to so that I can call myself an obedient Christian, but because the Word’s I read there, provide me with the strength I MUST have to face my daily struggles  without giving up in despair and sinking into depression.)

The lessons that teach me how to recognize fiery darts and how to counter their attack have become even more relevant as I listen to current news and read post exposing the ugliness spreading all across our land from coast to coast.

Maybe there was a time when we could bury our heads in the sand with the hope that by the time we lifted our heads the trouble would have passed.  But not today!  We must be aggressive in prayer and become active in reclaiming the ground WE gave over. Remember as Christians we have been given a mandate from God: 

if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.2 Chronicles 7:14:

And before I go any further, did you notice this verse was directed to people who are called by God’s name?  That means Christians, you know!

Why is it Christians can face what is going on in our country and not despair? Lots of reasons, actually, but here’s a few:

  1. God said in the Bible that the day would come when evil would be called good, and good would be called evil.
  •  Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; Isaiah 5:20

2.  And God warned us in His Word about the perils of the last days.

  • But evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived 2Timothy 3:13 

3.  We are also warned:

  • There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death. Proverbs 14:12 

And the further we distance ourselves from God’s Word (and the less we speak to Him in prayer), the less familiar we become with the ‘right’ way.  We become victimized by the lies of fiery darts and we can no longer recognize Truth. We begin to believe lies. I mean REALLY believe! Does that describe anybody in Washington that you know of?

So when we see the evil in the headlines being reported as good and vice versa, we can go to God’s Word for an explanation.  Why is that important to know?  Because knowing this keeps us from being blind sighted and puts us on our guard.

Because we are knowledgeable of the warnings God gives to us, we are also alerted to the fact that God has prepared a way for us to be overcomes.  Here’s a few to lift your spirits and protect you from despair.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and  petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippines 4:6-7

no weapon forged against you will prevail, Isaiah 54:17

Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. James 4:7

My personal favorite:

Trust in the Lord and do what is good; dwell in the land and live securely. Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart’s desires. Commit your way to the Lord trust in Him, and He will act, making your righteousness shine like the dawn, your justice like the noonday. Psalm 37:3-6

Yes, the fiery darts will tempt us to be fearful and fill us with despair.  But for those of us who take to heart the contrasting Truths in God’s Word we can resist this temptation with:

Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him For the help of His presence.Psalm 42:5

If you desire to become more equipped to recognize fiery darts and how to successfully wield the power of God’s Word against them, then please become more informed by reading my book:

Fiery Darts: Satan’s Weapon of Choice