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Ignorance is not bliss!

Aug31

As I write this blog post, I am in Edinburgh having accompanied my son and his family when they moved here so my son could work on a doctorate at the university. My plan is to hang around to help in any way that I can, then after my stay is completed I will make my solo journey home. (Not looking forward to that!!)

Being a genuine help, especially to my children, is a strong motivator for me. Yet, I struggle with fear that at 75 years of age, I will become limited as to how much help I will continue to be. Every increased ache or pain is taken advantage of by my flesh (that part of me that isn’t willing to be obedient to God’s Spirit in me), tempting me with doubts that I won’t be able to make but this one trip. My son will likely live here four or five years with his wife and two sons. Therefore my desire is to visit them once each year. But my flesh is stubbornly consistent in casting doubts and reeling in the thought that my desires won’t be fulfilled.

I battle constantly it seems with thoughts that my health will play out and prevent me from being the source of help and support I desire to be. When normal movement produces a sudden pain and/or discomfort , my thoughts become cloaked with negativity. Thoughts like, “You won’t last. What if you have to go to a doctor? You will become an inconvenience, not a source of help. That will mess up everything for them and for you.”

This is where my time of testing comes into full play. God has pointed out sources from His word where I can go to steady my thoughts and gain the perspective I need to assist me in recognizing the source of these doubts. The determination to reject them. And the insight to apply the powerful wisdom of these verses to defeat them. For instance: 

Psalm 34:4, ” I sought the LORD, and He answered me, and delivered me from all my fears.” (especially concerning the future of my health) 

God reminded me that my fears are nothing but fiery darts. My fears did not originate with Him. It was not His voice I was hearing. How did I know this? Because Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the LORD with all of your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.” 

Besides, Jeremiah 29:11 promises me this, “For I know the plans I have for you says the LORD. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. To give you a future and a hope.”

I can defeat the enemy by wielding the weapons God has assigned to me, or the enemy can defeat me by keeping me ignorant of such weapons.

Set backs will happen…

Jul8

I’m learning that reaching the final stage, Acceptance, in the grieving process doesn’t mean the road is now clear ahead. The other day, I made a run into town to Hobby Lobby, one of my favorite stores. I suspected this might be challenging. For you see, not only is it my favorite store, it was also Joney’s favorite.

Consequently, as soon as I walked through the door my mind was inundated with memories of the many shopping excursions Joney and I had made there. We never left that store empty handed. As a matter of fact, we often carried out more than we intended to buy! Sound familiar? But as God always does, He went before me and provided a shopping companion for me. My teenage granddaughter accompanied me thus lessening the impact going it alone would have had.

But eventually the time came to return my treasure of a granddaughter to her destination. Then I began the drive home. Once again, I was bombarded with memories. Memories of conversations that ran the gamut from deep spiritual thoughts to hilarious nonsensical thoughts. I could always count on Joney to spark a healthy dose of laughter to make the hard realities of truth easier to swallow. (Sounds like a line from Mary Poppins, doesn’t it)

Yet this time, I heard no ones voice but mine. And the quiet was, as they say, deafening . Loneliness enveloped me. I exerted much effort to block the negative, you know, fiery darts, with God’s Truth thoughts. Truths such as:

 fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10 ESV

 “My Presence will go with you (He was saying I was not alone), and I will give you rest.” Exodus 33:14, NIV

However, as strong as these Truths were, the cloud of sadness continued to envelope me. Sadness brought on by the loneliness I was feeling intensified as fear and doubt joined its rank. These fiery darts took advantage of my low spirits by pressing me with thoughts of additional complications I might be facing as I grew older and less likely to manage without help.

Nevertheless, I continued pressing in to God. Psalms 34 became my anchor. God kept saying, I will be with you, I will deliver you from all of your fears, I will save you, to take refuge in Him, and on and on. Words to focus on, to believe in and apply!

It took a few days for God’s words to steady me. But as the cloud slowly dissipated, I’ve come to realize that set backs are a useful part of the healing process. They have a God designed purpose. For when the fiery darts are fired, putting up our shield of faith is necessary, if we want to thwart the attack. By cooperating with God, He will utilize the effects of the set back for our good. The following verse reveals the outcome:

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10 NIV

Moving through grief, but keeping to the course…

Jun17

It’s been a few weeks now and while I’m still mourning the loss of my best friend, I do believe I have reached a turning point. The counsel of God, instructed me, early on, to take my time in grieving. And how long that time needed to be was up to me. So, I’m taking my time. Moving through as the light is given.

I spent time praying and seeking God’s counsel in His word. I’ve also leaned into writings of Christian writers that pointed me back to Christ. Such as C S Lewis and the website I referred to in an earlier post. I was prompted to cry out to God, like so many writers of Psalms did. For there was much I could not understand. I had questions, that had no answers. But I verbalized them to God, nevertheless. He was the only one who would allow me to unload without it threatening our relationship.

And that time spent in prayer and God’s word has and is bringing healing. The danger of dwelling on the unanswerable questions is that I wouldn’t move through the stages of grief in a healthy manner . I would get bogged down. For instance, “Grieving brings a deep sense of isolation. Isolation is a liar and tries to convince people they are alone and not understood.” Sounds like fiery darts doesn’t it!

But eventually, baby step by baby step, God is leading me out of my sorrowful darkness. While the pain may still be a dull ache that won’t go away, it is not as overwhelming as before. And while I may still have unanswered questions, I’m learning to not allow them to steal my focus. My moving forward will be impaired if I dwell on issues that are not in my realm to answer.

As I move into the Acceptance stage, I’m learning my reality has changed. “Acceptance has to do with concluding and moving on. We come to grips with the reality that there is no “going back to normal” rather, there is only a “new normal.”  My new normal is proving to be a learn-as-I go effort. I need God’s insight to navigate it successfully. Taking to heart God’s words from Scripture and applying them to my walk daily, gives me the light that will keep me on the path God has laid out for me.

The Realities of this season…

May11

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Growing old wasn’t so hard when I was in my 50’s and 60’s. Yet now that I’m in my 70’s, it’s as they say, “A whole new ball game!” The rules are different along with the conditions. The 70’s are proving to far more challenging. Last November my mother passed away at 100. For the first time in my life, I was forced to walk the path of my life without her presence. Without her input, without her support, without her assistance. That’s left a lot of empty spaces. It’s like entering a room where everything has changed but you still have to navigate a way through it, only without the familiar markers of the past.

The physical aches and pains of growing old are a cold reality in my 70’s. I can no longer skirt around the term ‘elderly.’ I am now one of those. And during the scope of the argument my body revolts at fully applying myself to the requirements of caring for and maintaining yard and home.

Now a new shadow has been cast upon the whole scene, as my best friend has fallen victim to cancer– she has been one of my most consistent reprieves to keep all this in balance. She always filled in the gap when three of my four children and their families moved out of state and one out of country. Taking in a movie, going for a bike ride, shopping therapy, doing lunch and even making road trips now and then provided the company I missed out on when my children moved away. Her godly counsel directed my thoughts towards an attitude that was more pleasing to God. Kept my mind directed towards pleasing God; not getting my own way or wallowing in self-pity.

The days ahead appear dark and lonely or so that is what the enemy would have me believe. My challenge at present is to pick up the weapons God has given me to thwart the enemy’s plan.



Ecclesiastes 3:1, ASV, For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven:

Isaiah 46:4, NLV, Even when you are old I will be the same. And even when your hair  turns white, I will help you. I will take care of what I have made. I will carry you, and will save you.

Ruth 4:15, NIV, He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age

2 Cor. 4:16, NKJV, Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.



Our perspective on life reveals?

Mar3

Perspective

For the last few days, it seems that my Bible study time and my devotional time have been drawing my attention to a common theme: the denial of Self!

Back a few weeks ago, I began in earnest to seek God’s wisdom concerning the difficulties I was facing. It’s beginning to dawn upon me that my perspective toward those difficulties are skewed towards self. My inner thoughts reflected the struggle within of who I was going to please, my old Self (the person I was before Christ) or my new Self (the person I was after accepting Christ). The following verse was highlighted in both my study and devotional time.

Then He said to them all, “If anyone wants to come with me, he must deny himself, take up his cross daily, and follow Me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life because of Me will save it. Matthew 16:24-25

We all endure hard times. There’s no escaping them. But God has a plan regarding those hard times! So does Satan! But allow me to preface this claim by saying, “If you don’t believe in the existence of God and Satan, you will drown in a sea of uncertainty. Life and the hard times that go along with it, will serve no purpose. The only certain claim is that we will ALL face death someday! What then?”

Recently my mother in law broke free of the bonds that tied her to this earth. She had lived a good life, full of the joys of serving God. However, she endured trying times, far more than most. Yet, she would be the first to say she had a joyful life. So what was joyful about her very difficult life? Way back toward the early part of her life, when it was likely at it hardest, she claimed the promise of God on how to save her life! She learned the secret of what it meant to take up her cross daily and follow Christ. 

So what does it mean to take up our cross daily?

After we give our life to Christ, it is His life, by the power of His spirit that takes up residence in our being. But the conflict is that our new spirit, (given to us at salvation, who seeks to please Christ) must share space with our old spirit (given to us at birth, who seeks to please Self). The clash between the two is real. Therefore it is imperative that we have a solid grasp of the truth of the following verse:

15 He died for everyone so that those who receive his new life will no longer live for themselves. Instead, they will live for Christ, who died and was raised for them. 2 Corinthians 5:15 NLT

That is the crux of the matter. It’s all about choosing who to please: God or Self. Until we are willing to receive the new life ruled by Christ in exchange for the old life ruled by Self, we can’t really understand the point Matthew 16:24-25 is making. How do we save our lives by loosing our lives?

It’s quite simple actually. If we can’t turn loose of the life that Self dictates, (you know, doing what we want to do even if it requires being disobedient to God and all the turmoil that goes along with such a choice) then we will not be able to experience the life Christ died to give us. (You know, a life that is reflected in Philippines 4:6-7, Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.)

Therefore, we can choose to allow Christ to guide our choices. The outcome of such a choice is a life built on a strong foundation.

Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. Matthew 7:24-26

Or we can choose to allow Self to dictate our choices. The outcome of such a choice is a life built on a weak and unstable foundation.

And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it. Matthew 7:26-27

What does our foundation look like? Have we been seeking to please Self or have we been seeking to please God? The question is answered by the perspective we assume when making our daily choices.

What does it mean to think like a Christian, or not?

Sep28
Who should I listen to?

Before becoming a Christian, our thoughts, attitudes, and behaviors were ruled by our personal desires. The aim of such desires is to fulfill thoughts centered on self, not God. Such thoughts and desires are heavily influenced by society. And if we allow today’s society to define what is good (instead of God’s word) then we enter a world darkened by the absence of God’s truth. As a result, our self-centered thinking sets the course of our lives, not God’s truth. So, if God’s truth is not our ‘go to’ authority on what is good for us, then what is?

The authority of inner feelings is now hailed as the authority of the day.(Back in the 60’s when the ideology of the day was “if it feels good do it” is nothing more than an update but with a wider following today on that same ideology) Better yet, if society endorses our feelings then we can feel free to express those feelings. And guess what, those thoughts will reinforce the idea that this is truly who we are! Back in the day, we called it rebellion. Today we call it expressive individualism.

The problem with this is that if an unchanging absolute authority does not define truth for us, then truth becomes something that is in a state of flux. What we determine as truth and what we reject as not being truth today, cannot be counted on to be the same tomorrow!

In contrast, upon becoming a Christian, our desire to please only ourselves, is put aside for the desire to please God. That voice inside our head telling us what is right and what is wrong, finds its source in the word of God. A Word that is absolute and unchanging.

Yet, as Christian we know that as long as we are alive, we now have two voices that compete for control of our thoughts. (Keep in mind that thoughts determines attitudes, and attitudes forms behavior.). Additionally, we know that the voice that speaks the loudest is the one we focus upon. Therefore, in order for God’s truths to speak the loudest we must be able to readily recognize it. If we do not consistently absorbs His truths, by spending time daily in God’s word and with God in prayer, then the voice of our flesh will take advantage of this lack of knowledge and drown out the Voice of truth.

Remember, to think like a Christian we need to have a sense of how God would want us to think. We aren’t going to know that unless we become familiar with what God thinks, right? And, the main place to find that out is in His Word. Otherwise, we will be allowing what we think to be determined by our self-centered nature.

What does it mean to show Christlike love to others who have rejected God and/or His ways?

Sep21

Even as we lived a life of disobedience, even as we rebelled against God’s standards of living, even as we rejected the existence of God, even as we refused to take God and Christ’s death seriously, God allowed Christ to be sacrificed for us. He didn’t wait for His ways to make sense to us before He offered us a solution.

Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die.  But God proves His love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:7-8

Admittedly, it’s hard to have loving feelings toward those who boldly reject God and His ways. Our world is upside down these days. Right is wrong and wrong is right! And what is more alarming is this deception has seeped into some of our churches! We Christians struggle to figure out how to stand strong in our faith without alienating those who have rejected God’s ways.

This is a prime dilemma that Satan eagerly takes advantage of. Ever hear the silent voice that says, “If you are kind and accepting of this person who lives in a way that mocks God and His ways, then that’s the same as condoning their sin.” You see, Satan has us focus on this fiery dart in order to deter us from verses like Romans 5:7-8.

What we fail to understand is that we can be kind and forgiving towards those who have fallen prey to the enemy’s deception, without compromising our faith values. How can we be kind and forgiving? By understanding the complex truth of separating the person we have issues with from the sins they have embraced!

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’  But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,… Matthew 5:43-44

It’s a slippery path to find ways to separate the sinner from the sin, of course. And our upside down world has made it even harder. But acknowledging that God loved us while we were still living in our sin, should empower us to do the same for others living outside of God’s will. This will provide us with the motivation to care enough about that person to deliver God’s truth to them with kindness and compassion. (Perhaps, we have been guilty of delivering the truth without the compassion?)

While we may be rejected and even persecuted by those we have attempted, with loving kindness, to be honest with, we must be prepared for this. Courageous love demands that we be truthful, whether they reject us or not or whether they reject God’s truth or not.

Personally, I don’t think there’s ever been a time when God’s truth has been so distasteful to so many. And these days we must count the cost before delivering His truth, for we could be made to suffer for it. We must keep in mind this world is not permanent; eternity is. And where we spend eternity is determined by what we do about God’s truths while we live here on earth.

What does it mean to live like a Christian? Learn to tell the difference between what freedom is and what it is not…

Sep13

By leaning upon God’s will, we are granted new and remarkable freedoms. The outside world sees us as chained. We go where they choose not, we see what they prefer to ignore, we dress in a manner they call severe. They hold up to us the so-called freedoms of this world and declare themselves happier for it. They live in blindness, both to the pains of others and the remorse and strife within their own souls.”

Quote by William Wilberforce, 1759-1833, A British politician and leader of the movement to abolish the slave trade

A venus flytrap (picture left)is like a spring-loaded trap that transforms into a ‘cage’ after responding to stimuli, such as when an unsuspecting insect contacts the surface.

Now you may be wondering what a carnivorous plant has to do with this post? Read on to discover the answer!

That fly was enticed by a sticky sweet juice emitted by the venus plant. This juice smells like a bouquet of fruit and plant flowers to the fly. Something quite familiar to the fly. Not realizing the danger it was in, it decided to check into what looked familiar to it. Thus it got mired down into the sticky substance and the teeth of the venus snapped shut and became a cage. Eventually the venus consumes the fly.

Christians who are not familiar with how the Bible defines truth are much like this fly. Their confusion about what is freedom and what is bondage leads to their entrapment.

A Christian whose search for freedom lies outside the boundaries of biblical truth, are venturing into a wilderness of deception. A wilderness where lies are disguised as truth and truth is disguised as lies. The side effects of living in this wilderness is blindness. A blindness that prevents them from seeing that the freedom and happiness they think they are experiencing is nothing more than license. And that happiness is nothing more than the thrill of getting their own way and getting pats on the back for it from others who wander about in the same wilderness.

But for a Christian, this fake freedom will eventually deteriorate. The Bible puts it rather succinctly.

 There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death. Proverbs 14:12 NIV

Christians who adopt the freedoms that run contrary to God’s word are entrapped just like the fly in a venus plant. Yet, unlike the fly there is a way to break free from such bondage before being consumed. By returning to God’s word, we will grow in wisdom and understanding as to the difference between true freedom and bondage. God’s light will illuminate the path of their escape. As the disciplining love of God turns them around and brings them to their senses, they will be restored to the fresh and cleansing winds of true freedom.

The Hay Cutting Dance; just what I needed…

Aug14

Being closed in for several days, has given me pause to consider ways to ward off the temptation (fiery dart) of a depressed spirit. I was reading in Psalm 34 the other day. Verses about praising God and being delivered from all my fears touched a cord. The key to my deliverance required praising God.

Yet, being shut up in my house for days on end, left me feeling like anything but praiseful . But just as I was struggling with all of this, a scene outside my window began to unfold. It’s hay cutting time here on the farm where I live. As a matter of fact, my home is tucked way back into the far corner of a big ole hayfield. Much to my delight. For the cutting of hay is one of my favorite enjoyments. 

Over a period of several days, I watched what I have come to call a ‘hay dance’, performed outside my window. And as I watched, praises to God began surging through my thoughts. Yep, as you might guess, those praises foiled the enemy’s attack. My spirits lifted with every step of the dance. Therefore, I thought, “Why not share this with my readers!” 

Hay cutting is like a good ole fashioned square dance between the tractors and their chosen partners!

(Disclaimer: I had to research the details for this article. I am familiar with the bigger picture b/c I live on the farm, but those details, not so much)

Just like any dance, timing is the first consideration. This is reflected by making sure the equipment is prepared and ready. Then I’ve learned that haymaking needs to coincide with the right stage of plant growth and weather conditions. My brothers and nephews have been cutting hay for so long, they just seem to have a second sense about this timing thing. 

Whether they begin early in the morning or later in the day seems to be a matter of preference. Nevertheless, the determining factor for when to start the dance depends upon the maturity of the grass.

Next step, choose your partner. The dance begins with the tractor choosing a mower implement for its partner. My family uses a rotary disk mower. This type of mower cuts quickly through thick hay pretty well. They have three huge hayfields to cut so the quicker the better.

Again change partners by swapping out the mower for a tedding implement. This implement fluffs up the hay. That allows the air and sun to reach the undersurfaces to promote drying.

This unique dance requires a lot of partner changing. Therefore, the tedding implement must be exchanged for the rake. Raking turns the hay one more time to dry the bottom and forms it into what is referred to as a windrow. Then it’s ready to be baled.

Around here they opt for large circular bales, I remember the day when small rectangular shaped bales were scattered all over the field. But as acreage increased and technology advanced the circular bales became the modus operandi. And the bailer is called to the floor turning out bale after bale of hay.

Now comes the tricky step. So, one of those big ole tractors attaches what is called a bale spear to the front and rear of the tractor. In the photo below, you’ll see a round bale on the front and the back of the tractor. A maneuver that requires expert skill.

If a dancer gets in a hurry and find themselves in the habit of moving forward before raising the loader; they’ll be scraping that bale on the ground. This misstep can tear the bale wrap or bale twine, loosening the bale and lowering the quality of the hay.

 We are almost to the time to bow. One final turn requires the bales to be loaded onto a trailer and carried to the barn. Those gigantic bales can’t be just left lying on the dance floor. (The bales suffer matter loss if left in the fields) 

Now that I have described the hay dance, allow me to describe the setting. Hay cutting is a much looked forward to event, not for just us humans but for the birds and insects as well. Actually, the calls of the kites, swallows, and locusts blend with the hum of the tractor engines to provide the music for this dance. Taking the movements, music, and the fresh aroma of new mown hay, praising God became as natural as breathing. Just proving God supplies what we need, at the moment of our need. 

God’s Way vs Man’s Way

May31

In light of the trauma cast throughout our country in recent days, we grasp at words wherever we can find them to help us find sanity in this insane crises. And it seems to me it comes down to finding Truth. For without Truth, we will search in vain for words to bring peace in the midst of our chaos.

But how can our country expect to find Truth, when we reject the one true source of Truth? Nevertheless, we continue plunging forward under the false impression that we are doing so in the name of personal freedom. We have thrown off the restraints that have restricted what we became convinced would make us happy.

Here is a brief sampling of the restraints we have discarded:

Wisdom to discern what is good and what is not.

“Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.” Proverbs 28:26 ESV

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all those who practice it have a good understanding. His praise endures forever!”Psalm 111:10 ESV

Peace in the midst of life’s storms.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Soundness of mind/freedom from fear.

I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 ESV

So, when we throw off the ability to recognize what is good and what is not, where does that lead?

So, when we reject God’s peace, what’s the outcome when the storms of life face plant us to the ground?

So, when we cast off God’s offer of soundness of mind and to be free of fear, how will we know what to do when we are threatened?