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Roller Coaster Riding

Jun30

Well, today I am going to be a bit transparent. As I live my life (turning 77 soon!) I’m discovering that life doesn’t, necessarily, improve with age. You might think that the gray hair, wrinkles, and/or physical decline would present the greatest challenges. But for me, that is not the case. I’m learning to accept that as the realities of growing old. Not much fun but it’s reality. I’m learning, with God’s grace, to accept the inevitable. Besides, it’s what’s on the inside that really matters.

However, my greatest struggle occurs when I ponder the future. My husband and I have four children and children in laws, plus ten grandchildren. Yet, they all live in other cities, states, and even continents. Thus, most of our days are spent facing the challenges of maintaining our house and property on our own. In addition, all of which is complicated by our dwindling physical capabilities. While I love my country home and the serenity of its setting, the future is colored with darkened shades.

On the other hand, there are days when my faith surges strong. When I look into the future during such times, hope shines bright, and the darkness is dispelled. But then the fiery darts strike and doubt and fear do their dirty work. It’s like a roller coaster of emotions. My self-centered sinful nature fighting with my God-centered Christlike nature.

Here’s what I have recently determined. I am always going to ride this roller coaster. But on those days when my faith surges, it’s typically because a promise from Scripture sharpened my focus. I had spent time with God in prayer and His word. While He held my attention He reminded me of something I had let slip my mind. For example:

In reading Matthew 6:26, God reminds me He is faithful to sustain the birds of the air. So if He does that for the birds, He will more than do that for me. How can I believe this? Because I am much more valuable to God than the birds.

Additionally, there’s this word in Philippines 4:19, where God reminds me that He will provide all my needs according to His riches. And I can trust Him to keep His promises.

It’s only when I loose my focus of the above truth thoughts, can the fiery darts get past the threshold of my mind. As I am reminded from my book, “Above all, we must be especially alert against the beginnings of temptation, for the enemy is more easily conquered if he is refused admittance to the mind and is met beyond the threshold when he knocks.” FD’s 3rd edition, page 34

In conclusion, I have determined I must do two things: 1) be consistent in spending time with God daily in prayer and His word 2)Take to heart when God’s Spirit points out a truth to me. And by the way, live in the present. Allow God to take care of my future. Don’t allow worry to cloud up my days.

Embracing Contentment: Life Lessons in Winter – Part 2

Jun6

Initially as we approach our declining years, we find ourselves at a crossroads. It all sounds a bit overwhelming, doesn’t it, and if we aren’t careful, it will be. Personally, in comparison, the season of winter has been the most trying and challenging.

Until this season there was always the activities of caring and enjoying my family and friends, serving in my church, and teaching school. Without these fulfilling and purposeful activities, I struggled to find my purpose. I was tempted to see the road ahead as dull and unfulfilling! Yet I knew that sort of vision, if it persisted, would lead to major fiery dart attacks. I also knew that God had better plans for me.

However, the word that surfaces most often in my head these days is ‘contentment.’  I’m discovering contentment, while desirable, isn’t all that easy to come by. Nonetheless, that’s what I desire in this season. Therefore, I have persisted in my pursuit to be content. I’m finding, however, it isn’t automatic! It’s not something I can have just because it’s a better option. You know how I discovered that? Well, I direct you to:

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 

Did you catch that word ‘learned?’ Well, I didn’t ‘catch’ it until I found myself in short supply of contentment. It just wasn’t happening for me to make up my mind to be content. Ugh! This was challenging. As I returned to that verse again and again, the light finally clicked on. Contentment is a learning process. I had to learn to be content. Day by day, step by step!

I’m learning in this season that every moment is holy because God is present, no matter the circumstances,  He is present with me in all my situations, even if the situations are difficult to bear. God reminds me there is no need for me to fear for He is with me; I do not have to be dismayed, for He is God, He will strengthen me and help me. His presence assures me of this, as well as His word.

While bouts of loneliness, uncertainty, and/or sadness threaten my contentment at times, I’m learning that focusing on truths like Isaiah 41:10, is a game changer. Fiery darts such as these can be conquered when contentment rules. And that is a wondrous thing to learn in the winter season of my life. Yours too, I pray!

Positive power vs negative power

Aug31

th-8

Positive thinking has positive power. Negative thinking has negative power!

     I bet you knew that! “That’s just logical,” you might say. But there’s a vast difference between knowing about this power and feeling the impact of such power.  

     I know all too well the effect of negative thinking. I wrote a book, entitled: Fiery Darts: Satan’s Weapon of Choice, based on  my first hand experience of this destructive force. Regretfully, it took me many years before my eyes were opened.   Thankfully, I didn’t live my whole life ignorant of the enemy’s power. 

Positive power at work

     Recently, while in a low mood (prime time to get attacked by fiery darts) my mind strayed to the recent departure of two of my children. Both lived relatively close to me. And with a son living in Africa, their closeness was a constant source of comfort. Then a few months ago, two of my three daughters, moved in opposite directions about 11 hours away. The negative power of sadness began to claim my thoughts. 

     Yet, in these moments, the following thoughts began rising to the surface: “During the times your children and grandchildren lived nearby you made a ton of wonderful memories. Why don’t you focus on those instead? Start thanking God for those memories.” So I did. As I filled my mind with one blessed memory after another, the negative power fueled by negative thoughts diminished. The more I praised God for those sweet memories, the better I felt. 

     But not one to give up easily, Satan sent me another fiery dart. My thoughts were redirected towards another situation in my life that has the potential to create burdensome thoughts. On the tails of my recent reminder, I was prompted to find the good that came out of that burdensome situation. A bit harder perhaps, (Satan’s is clever like that) because the burden is something I continue to wrestle with. Yet, the good is there! Once again, the negative was drained away and the positive began to soothe me.

     As a Christian, I live by the God’s Truth and not the lies of fiery darts. My mind is being renewed every time I spend time with God in prayer and His Word (the Bible). 

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2 NIV

     So, think about it. A mind not experiencing renewal by God’s Truth, is a mind subject to negative power. The negative power of Satan’s lies and manipulation. A decision to take to heart John 3:16, allows us the resources to expose Satan’s negative power. A power that is no match for the positive power of God’s Truth. 

 

God speaks!

Oct28

In the last few days these (Truth)thoughts have been pressed into my thinking:

 

The trials in my life are developing perseverance.

(Came to me while I was watching someone lead a worship service)

Reminded me of James 1:2-3

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.

    *     *    *     *     *

There are a few battles that I have to let God fight for me! In the meantime, I must be still and know that God is God!

(Came to me while I was sharing with a friend!)

Reminded me of Exodus 14:14

The LORD will fight for you while you keep still.

Which reminded me of Psalm 46:10

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;

*     *     *     *     *

I must live my life from God’s perspective!

(Came to me as I read a blog from one of my favorite bloggers.)

Reminded me of James 1:17 

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

*    *     *     *     *

 

And I thought God was being silent!

Who’s Messing With Your Self Worth?

Oct7

The Cognitive Triangle

The Cognitive Triangle

First we entertain a thought. That thought will cause certain related feelings. Thus, behavior is based on our thoughts and feelings.  p.16, FD

     Several years ago and over a two year period of time, I suffered from a serious bout of depression. I remember battling suicidal thoughts and deep sadness to the point that my prayers became a desperate cry for God to hold on to me because I had no strength left to hold on to Him.  I survived that dark time in my life but that’s about it. It wouldn’t be until several years later as God initiated my training in fiery dart recognition that I would be able to recognize the bondage that defined my existence during those two years. 

Here’s what happened to me and I see this same overused but deadly effective tactic of Satan’s still being used today!

     Refer to the diagram above. In my case I was a people pleaser. If I felt significant people in my life approved of me, then life was good and I felt good about myself. On the other hand, if there was strife or conflict in these relationships life was not good and I became convinced I had little reason to feel good about myself. Self approval you see was strongly connected to what others thought of me. (Or what I thought they thought!)

Do you see the pattern?

     First this negative thought (fiery dart remember) would plant itself into my head producing some very negative feelings or emotions. Never mind that these negative thoughts had no basis in Truth! The poison of these fiery darts seeped into my thinking producing destructive attitudes and behavior. 

     The purpose of these fiery darts, you see, was to diminish any sense of self worth that I might still possess. I was an easy target because it was way too important for me to have the good opinion of those significant people in my life. As relationships with these people deteriorated, so did my self worth.

I wonder if I have touched a nerve? 

     Are you sad seemingly all the time? Are you convinced you don’t measure up and that significant persons in your life don’t approve of you? Does the dangerous thought that your family would be better off without you ever sneak into your mind? Please hold on, for I have glorious news for you in my next post. In the meantime hold on to the following verse,

For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the LORD. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. To give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

What we think determines how we feel. . . or “as a man thinks in his heart so is he.”

Nov3

Ponder this quote from my book:

What we think determines how we feel and what we feel influences our actions.  p. 15, Fiery Darts: Satan’s Weapon of Choice

The mind is constantly thinking.  Everything we see, feel, or touch, influences the thoughts we think.  Thus, how we behave will be determined by what we think.

If there is a troublesome behavior with which you seem to struggle, as a Christian what are you going to do about it?  Do you find yourself saying,

“I just can’t seem to help myself.”

Paul talked about this very thing in the Book of Romans.  He struggled like so-o-o many of us do.  Just read this:

For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Romans 7:19

I feel his pain, don’t you? 

I want to talk to those of us, who find ourselves doing things we really don’t desire to do.  Like, caving in to negative thinking (fiery dart thinking) like the following: (list is just random thoughts that came to mind.)

feeling sorry for ourselves, (blaming others for the problems in our lives)

living an undisciplined life, lack of self-control (you know, eating too much, not having consistent quiet time, giving into temptation, stop going to church),

being unwilling to say no to ourselves, going after what we want when we want it (and always feeling guilty in the process),

believing that we are inferior to others or superior (being blind to our mistakes)

not having confidence in ourselves,

believing what the world says about us and to us, more than believing what God’s Word says on that subject.

Did you know that all of the above are examples of fiery dart thinking?

If we keep giving in to this type of thinking, our futures are in jeopardy.  We will believe things about ourselves that aren’t true. (Prov. 23:7) We will stray from the path God has planned for us and His peace, security, and success  for us becomes seriously threatened. Is that what you want?  Of course not!

Then here’s what I suggest you do!

1. Get your Bible out and open it up.  Start reading it.  Commit to reading just one verse every day.  I suggest, Jeremiah 29:11 for starters. Don’t commit to much more than that.  You don’t want to set yourself up for failure. 

2. Say a one sentence pray.  “Dear God, Guide me.”  That’s enough.  Once again, don’t set yourself up for failure.  You’ve experienced too much of that already.

Start every day, for the next week (or whatever length of time you are comfortable with) , using this verse and prayer.

If you like, let me know what happens.

By the way, when you are sitting with nothing to do, perhaps you would like to read my book.  It will be your training manual on how to overcome negative thinking (fiery dart thinking) referred to in this post. (There’s a 5-step plan on p. 79 you should find interesting.)

I will be praying for you,

Until next post–